Thursday, September 16, 2010

Life

I believe that there is no harder job in this world than that of a stay-at-home mother; with that said, over the past 14 years of being a homemaker I have put everyone's needs, likes and dislikes before my own. Before Tom and I were married and before we had children I had a small career that I enjoyed, I traveled, bought fabulous handbags, and had friends. I still love Louis Vuitton and we travel all the time but something is missing. I love my family and couldn't imagine life without them but I need something more. Our bank called yesterday and ask if I would please consider taking a part-time position, my heart jumped at the thoughts of getting out in the real world for a few hours each day but then they told me the hours and there's no possible way that I could make it work with the boys' schedules and Tom's work. I feel hopeless! I feel so guilty for even feeling this way because I know I have a wonderful husband, two great sons and I have been blessed to be home with my family. I miss the old me, I just wish I knew where she lived.

2 comments:

Hautemama said...

You could not have posted this at a better time for me. I just started working part time during school hours 3 days a week at my insurance agent's office. I was so bored at home that I've gained 10 pounds sitting around eating all summer. I too want new purses and the ability to go buy makeup without having to consult my husband first. Granted, he's a wonderful man but also an accountant which, by gosh, means he doesn't believe in expensive makeup-ugh! Keep looking and you'll eventually find something that will work-its always fun to be around people a couple of hours during your week! Don't feel guilty, some people are more social than others!

jen said...

Don't feel guilty! I don't know how old your kids are but now that my kids are 11 and 14, I'm back to school getting a masters and reinventing the old me. Do I still feel guilty? Yes. But I was with them for almost 10 years and I believe I'm teaching them something new now--to learn to see their mother as a person too.